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The holidays are supposed to be a time to spend with family. Unfortunately, it’s easy to find your family racing from one gathering to the next without taking time to breathe. By the time New Year’s Eve rolls around, the tidings of comfort and joy can easily be replaced by resentment and stress if you don’t make an effort to spend time with the person closest to you.

A few years ago, my husband brought me a wine basket the week before Christmas. The next night, my mom picked up the kids and took them for the night. He knew that I was at my breaking point with more parties, Christmas Eve and Christmas day still to come. The truth is, when I get to that point, I’m pretty miserable to be around.

That night, we broke open a bottle of wine and enjoyed the peace and quiet. The basket was filled with some of my favorite chocolates, which my husband was smart enough to push in front of me. For hours, we sat and played cards on the floor like we did before kids.

I didn’t realize until then how much we’d let go of when our world was turned upside down by kids. Don’t get me wrong, neither one of us would change what we have now, but it was a sad realization that the couple we were was slipping away.

Since that night, we’ve tried to find one night per month to do things we used to love.

The other thing we do during the holidays is say no. We no longer get caught up in where we have to be when. If there are too many functions scheduled on the same day, we decide which to attend and which to bow out of. Yes, it means missing out on some things, but is it really worth it if everyone goes home tired and crabby?

When was the last time you took a night during the holidays to be thankful for the most important things in your life?

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